My home education and autonomous learning story

I can't remember how I heard about home education. I just know that by the time my first child was born, 10 years ago, I knew I would never send her to school. I remember holding her in my arms and announcing to my family one Sunday that I was going to home educate. To say they were shocked is an understatement. "How will she make friends, learn, socialise?", the questions were fired. I walked away; they didn't really want to hear the answers.

Anyway, while reading a local NCT newsletter, I stumbled across an article on home education by a woman living in Manchester. I attended a coffee morning at her house and invited myself back to talk about home education. She home educated in an autonomous way - child led. This really made sense and appealed to me. The rest is history. I still know this woman (as do many EO members)! Julie is one of my closest friends and has supported and listened to me through the births and education of my (now 4) children. She's always been there for those moments of doubt "are they learning?, am I doing it right?", to listen and encourage. Along with Jill, Sue, Nikki, Anthony and my sister Amanda, I feel very lucky having such a support network of wonderful people, who all home educate in a similar way.

So what do we do? At first I had no idea how I would home educate. I did a lot of reading: EO newsletters, John Holt books, etc. and spoke to those I knew who also home educated. Then the years just seemed to fly by. I suppose as my eldest reached "legal education age" I was busy looking after her and my 3 year old, so we carried on with life as we had always done. Getting out regularly, painting, baking, reading, etc. Life was and still is very busy. How we would have fitted in "structured" learning I do not know.
I then had another 2 children. My children are aged 10, 7, 4 and 16 months. Over the years I will admit I've had doubts about whether I am doing it the right way (is there one)? Hence the large pile of mostly unused workbooks. Fortunately these phases don't last very long and are soon ended by seeing the frustration on my kids faces and knowing in my heart that for us at least this is not the right way.

A typical day in our house? It starts probably later than I would like. My older 2 are night owls and as I currently write this, the school holidays mean friends round, late nights and sleepovers. Thus today they got up at 10am. Their days are often filled with television and LOTS of play. Particular favourites are role-playing games. They may have seen something on TV that sparks off an interest e.g. playing World War 2, orphans, survivors, etc. Along with this play comes making things, writing, asking questions.... They really are learning all the time. Yesterday I stood and watched joyfully as they showed me the boats they had made from leaves and sticks on a mud river at the park where we spend MANY a sunny day. We don't at the moment do any "structured "work, though A... (9) has decided she wants to do "school" in September. We'll see how long that lasts and if she can surface from her bed by 9am!!

One thing I would like to talk about in this article is reading. I guess inwardly I panicked when at 6 then 7 my daughters were not reading books. I read that home educated children, in particular autonomously educated children, often read later, sometimes at 10, 11, 12. This calmed me for a while though it was hard. Sometimes I did think maybe they'll never read and it will all be my fault. At 10 and 7 my eldest don't read books yet, though they are NOT illiterate. I can't tell you how many times a day I am asked the question "What does this say?" "How do you spell this?". They can read and recognise a lot of words, and what is more have not been put off learning, as I would NEVER push them to do something they didn't want to do. I must have patience and trust. They will read one day and will do so because they WANT to not because someone tells them to. Sites on the internet I found particularly useful are www.unschooling.com especially the message boards where you can get answers to your questions; and ‘Learn to Read Naturally’(do web search for address). I know I spent many a late night reading these and they restored my faith!!

So that's my story to the present day. My children are all active, growing and inquisitive. They have a freedom in childhood most of us never had and could only of dreamed of. Their futures? Well, all I wish for their futures is that they will be happy, be themselves and do what they want to do. How could any parent ever wish for anything else, after all this is their life not mine!